Father's Day

Five years ago, I wrote a special entry on my blog about my most memorable Christmas. I am posting it here because aside from it being my Christmas story, it is also a fatherhood tale.

Friday, November 28th, 2003
Subject: Dad's Most Precious Gift
Mood: Nostalgic

Around 10 Christmases ago, my dad bought me two dolls as his Christmas presents. But for some reason, he decided to give me only one of them and hid the other in my room so that I'll "discover Santa's gift for me" later on. The one that he hid was a big and beautiful furry Santa bear with a red and gren plaid scarf and black rimmed glasses. and the one that he gave me himself was a tiny African baby doll. It didn't even have 'real hair'.

I was so disappointed when I saw it. Not only because i found the doll ugly but because it looked rather cheap and because it was the only present he gave me. I cried and cried and shoved the doll back to my dad. I said that I didn't want it because it was ugly. When I couldn't be consoled, dad finally led me to my room where the SAnta bear from "Santa Claus" was. As soon as I saw the big bear, I realized that it was from dad and that he just gave me the small doll as a 'cover up' for the bigger present. I looked up at dad. He was looking at me, sort of expecting that I'd give him a big smile and say, 'I have a beautiful present fom Santa' and that I'd forget about the little doll that he gave me.

That night, I cried in my room, not because I was dissatisfied by his bigger gift but because I realized how ungrateful I was and how I must've hurt dad's feelings. I didn't even thank him after he gave me the little doll. I just said that i didn't want it. I behaved like a brat without thinking of his feelings. Sadly, I haven't apologized to him even to this day.

Three days ago, my lola cleaned our stock room and found that little African baby doll. When she gave it to me, I gave it a closer look for the first time. I came to see that it was the most beautiful thing that my dad has ever given me and that it was more precious than all the other presents more expensive and more beautiful than it. I placed it on my topmost shelf, enclosed in glass, and seated beside my most treasured books. There it will stay as one of my most precious possessions.

I cannot imagine how difficult it must have been for my dad to raise me without my mother. My less than perfect-little-angel self probably caused him so much frustrations over the years. I hope I had at least brought him joy, even if it was short-lived.

On this Father's day, I wish you happiness, good health and wealth. I wish you the love of friends and family, though they are thousands of miles away.

I thank you for all you have done, and all that you have given and sacrificed for me. Know that I am, and always will be, daddy's girl. I love you Dad.